people who slip into proper grammar when they’re upset are terrifying
*goes to bed at 2am instead of 5am* wow, my life is so in order right now. i’m making such good decisions for myself and my body and my soul and im so in love with myself for doing this
that feeling you get when you’re angry
how many “friend-zoned” guys does it take to change a light bulb? None they’ll just compliment it and get pissed when it won’t screw.
this is the best joke ever
this is the teacher from the incredibles